what a month

This month I have regained some sort of normality agian. Not about myself because I found that along the way this year, my old self and am seeking to find people I can start a Foodnotbombs function with, I am determined to make a difference in this life! No this normality, well actually it is stability that has returned, I got a job as a reservation manager for a moving company. Thats right folks an office job, the kind that i protested when i was in my 8th grade band the evil pixies, and I guess still did till i got hired last week. I think I was worried about becoming jaded and stuck. I don't want to end up like my father, who should have been computer engineer but got stuck in a hospital(the money got to him). I guess I was afraid the money would get me comfortable, but I will say that there is not enough money where I am to get comfy. I just had to prioritize again, as one does when their thoughts are like a game of pictionary, scribbles all over the place trying to form a complete thought. I have once again made the list that will be posted on my desk to remind me why I am talking to the angry customer about how the truck seats aren't soft enough. It is the list that has all my priorities/dreams/goals on it.

L

house

marriage

kids

happiness

This list has gotton me through tough rushes, bad customers and spilled drinks. Now it will again serve its purpose when I want to take a nap at my desk or just can't take another call about why can't they bring the truck to somewhere else if blockbuster charges you then what do you think will happen with a vehicle.

Also this month I got a kitty!!! Her name is december and at the moment she is asleep on my bed oh excuse me her bed. I love her sooooo much, she has for now stopped my biological time clock from ticking so loud. I know I am twenty but I just can't help it i have the need. Anyway I love getting up in the morning and see that she is patiently waiting by my head pawing ever so gently just enough to wake me for her breakfast. Not to sound like crazy cat lady, but this love is so different I understand it now and am glad that I was given this gift, for christmas no less. My amazing girlfriend L gave her to me and that makes it even better because i think of her everytime i look at December and am overcome with love. Yes i know sappy but what can I say I feel I have purpose even if it just to sustain this cat's life.

Well off to bed must get up early to feed the kid and get ready for work :)

*look forward*

This year is coming to an end and there are many things I want to make better not change. Change implies that it must be a 180 which is an impossible goal and would be setting myself up for failure.

Things to better:

eating habits: switching to a mostly vegitarian diet and organic if i can help it

exercise: try my best to go for hike and do yoga at least once a week if not more

personality: try to ask how was your day? more often and less chatter about mine

also try to be less passive and explain how i feel about something when I feel it.

Spiritually: do ritual once a week if not more and meditate twice a week try to remember that the universe is one and that peace can be found anywhere.

Determination: take my GED passing is what I want but right now the focus is doing the best I can so the pressure won't promise me a fail. Also try even in a tiny effort to start a foodnotbombs function.

General:make someones day a little better